Hard reality

 Edit edit edit. I had to see what reading the book was like from a readers perspective. While doing that edit for grammar and some content. Something I have figured out about my book is that it is a little longer than most. I did not intend this to be, it just happened that way.
It's only fair I read it since I am not exactly the avid reader. If I can't tolerate it or it's length how can I possible expect anyone else to feel like reading it too?
 That turned out to be a good thing. It took me 9 days total and I found that I did not mind reading it, after a few things were fixed!
 As I search for new publishing possibilities it came to my attention that there are things I can do in stages to prepare the book for publishing. I tried a Booster campaign that got me no closer to cover design than I was already. Quite the opposite, the shirts sold some and there was such sweet support from my Google Plus friends that I decided to make sure they got their shirts. When time came I ordered the remaining shirts to make the minimum but got no cover design funds in the process.

All good! Destiny has a design and this was not part of it. Time to figure out what next.
 Then something really cool happens. During a hangout on the air my friend Priya Sharma and I get the attention of one of the participants in the hangout who is talking about a fascinating program she devised. Tara Meyer-Robson liked the conversation we were having in the comments section which made her decide to contact us. I was offered her program at a substantial discount! Being already interested at full price I jumped on the gift and graciously thanked her profusely.
 Going through the program blew my mind at how easy she makes every step. Once I finished reading through....well....there was nothing but gratitude! This is where it takes a strange turn. I could not do something she described about creating graphics. There was another friend who creates amazing graphics named Vishal Singh, he told me about the program he uses and where I can find the download. That began my exploration. Soon I had taught myself the program and was creating 'things'. My doodles became more serious, I was creating actual graphics. Had learned the photo manipulation and free design well enough to make some things that would make great t-shirts.

  This takes me onto a new direction. One that puts the book on the back burner for a while and lets me be the artist in a new medium to add to my paintings! That's fine with me right now because I need a break from this stress! Creating is what I like to do and it's time for that again.  As to the book, there is more editing to be done, no cover design possibility yet, and I have no ability to hire the people to get this done. Definitely time to take a break and let destiny point the way. I'll just edit on my own anf try to shorten it more.





  
 Now another bonus excerpt from my book because you stuck with me!
Page 4 (with the rest of 3)

  Hi ho hi ho a back to work I go. I’m liking this new job so far and a lot of the people I am working with seem pretty cool. It’s too bad my high school friend Joe is on p.m. though, it would be nice to hang with him again because after I graduated everything went crazy for the last 6 years. We, tragically, lost touch. However, Phil, Dina, Gisong, Joy and Wendy, all good nurses and people that I am enjoying learning about. When   Phil and I were partnered together they gave us a patient load twice normal size to make up for the sick call out they received earlier. No big deal though, we got things done very quickly as a team, we’ve had no complaints only compliments.

  The end of my shift approaches, Nooo please noooo! They don’t need anyone to do a double, think it’s funny the new guy asks. I blame it on needing to catch up for my “2 weeks off”, which wasn’t a total lie, I kinda needed the income, but my interests were truly with having more time with Sheila.

  On the way back to the house what Sheila had told me about her accident ran over and over in my head. Especially the time of year thing that she is sad about, wishing I could do something to cheer her up even just a little. So when I get home…I run upstairs to grab my potent smokables, kick on some music and think of Dreamgirl to see what kind of evil plans I can concoct to snare her heart, or cheer her up some.

  After three hours in the house alone chilling myself out with my dear friend Maryjane, people starting arriving home for the day. First April, then Liz, and then Joe and T.J.

When dinner was done April and T.J. felt like tossing back a few beers so I joined in just to get my mind off of Sheila for a while. We got pretty messed up and ended up playing some computer game for hours. It didn’t get my mind off of Sheila completely, as I kinda didn’t want it to anyway, but just enough to calm my brain was what I wanted. That night after I fall asleep that thing that always happens when I see Dreamgirl does so again, but this time she doesn’t disappear before I can reach her. Instead, she walks up to me and gives me a huge hug. I think the dreams have changed forever. Finally we make contact when we never have before. In the dream reality we are very friendly, if you know what I mean. She was waiting for me to pick her up to go to the Crocker art gallery for our date. The strange thing was that Sheila was walking around (in the dreams she was never in a wheelchair, she was her pre-collision self), but I remember putting her chair in the trunk just in case we needed it which made me quickly realize any doubt I had that Sheila was NOT the woman I’ve seen for years while asleep was completely gone. A funny thing happened at the end of this dream, I took Sheila home and after we kissed goodnight we went into different apartments that were next to each other. My last thought was “WOW! That’s where she lives, how weird that we live right next to each other. Talk about convenience factor!”

Waking was quite the experience. The reality of what happened in my sleep put me in an unusually good mood. Solid confirmation in my mind that Sheila is the one I have been seeing all these years. As messed up as the last two months has been, being burned out of my apartment, losing 90% of all I own, the complete upheaval of my life and even getting fired for refusing to wear a back brace that caused my back pain…a lot of crap! Now suddenly the most unexpected thing happens, in the most unexpected place and time. Talk about weird timing. The thought comes, my life was burned away save the most precious things, my old job dispatched by another’s stupidity. Though I could have fought for the job and easily won because I had a corporate level rep. handling my pre-termination grievance who wanted me to fight, it felt right to just let it go. Poor Mary, the nursing director, lost her job a few days later because of the situation. I found out through the letter I received offering me future employment at such time I should be searching.  I will say this about that job; the people I worked with at the Eskaton facility and the Homestead of Fair Oaks itself was a great facility where I m still happy to have been employed. Even after my termination I had no ill feelings toward Mary, something else was going on in her life that messed with her emotions.